Disturbed

For those of you who actually read this and don't know, I am a carrier of Hepatitis C and TB.
Long and sorted stories shortened, we are unsure of where exactly I contracted either disease.

The best that either of my infectious disease specalists can figure, the Hepatitis C was contracted when I got a tattoo during my junior year at college. One color (red) was not opened in front of me and we're guessing that was the color that may have been re-used. A needle could not have been cleaned properly, although all of the instruments were opened in front of me. There is a slight chance that I could have gotten Hep C from blood transfusions I had as a premature infant back in 1982 (before blood products were tested in 1992) but my doctors have two theories about this: 1) most of my transfusions were from my father and he has tested negative and 2) the amount of Hep C that was found in my body was really too small of an amount to have been laying dormant for 24 years.  The best guess? The tattoo. 
I found out that I had Hep C after I attempted to give blood for the Red Cross during college. I have since gone through 48 weeks of horrible hell and concoctions of medications but have been in remission since July of 2005. I go in once a year for check-ups on my health and liver.  This year, I will go 2 months after Sprout is born to make sure the Hep C hasn't flared up.

The TB (found out about in 2006) is also an unknown; however, when the State Health Department called (talk about being freaked out!) and said that they need information to track where I may have contracted this, we think it may have been where I did my student teaching. The population there has a higher percentage of Native American students and families and evidently, they are in the higher percentage of the population that carries TB (according to this woman). Really, who knows where I got it. But I got it. Thankfully, it is inactive right now and I don't have to do much other than watch my coughing and go to the doctor if anything changes. I did try to to do the medication that helps combat the active TB but developed nasty side effects that were making it hard to function.

Anyway, after all that, I am very aware of what these disease do to your body and to your life. No, I don't let either get me down but I do have certain things I need to do to protect myself and those around me, especially my family.

So when I saw this article this morning, I was beyond irritated. It makes me want to cry, yell and throw up all at the same time. Those patients did absolutely.nothing. to deserve this.

This is an update from the original article, which I cannot find my link to...sorry....
"No Remorse for tech who gave Hep C..."
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34920322/ns/us_news-crime_and_courts/?GT1=43001

38 weeks and 5 days....

36 weeks

• I still can't believe that we've made it this far. 

• I can't believe that I am just a mere 9 days away from my due date. 

37 weeks

• I can't believe that this is my house - the house full of baby furniture, strollers, carseat, swing, rocker, Dreft and tiny outfits. 

• I still can't believe I'm going to be a mom to a beautiful daughter. 

38 weeks 3 days

• I honestly still can't believe that I'm pregnant.

Our house has thrown-up baby stuff everywhere. The nursery is still not ready but hopefully by this weekend, we will have furniture.  We have to wait until this weekend to get furniture in there but we still need 1/4 round trim, a transition piece between the floor and hallway carpet and felt pads for the furniture.

I still need to return a few items (tomorrow with my momma), get a pair of pants for the baby, get a lamp and a rug, some wall stickers and maybe a picture or two.  Definitely getting the bedding we need and pants, and the wall stickers. The lamp, rug and pictures may wait. Did I mention we changed how we're decorating the nursery? Yep. I'm neurotic.

The carseat came out of the box today and will be installed tomorrow. The swing is not out of the box yet, nor is the pack n' play or stroller.  We don't have our bouncy seat because Babies R Us didn't have it. I really wanted to have it before she came but it is going to have to wait. And we will have to wait on ordering more cloth diapers, get our wet bags and look at a breast pump until later.

Everyone keeps telling me that, in the end, it doesn't matter. And realistically, I know it won't. But I'm internally freaking out. In more ways than one. And I'm uncomfortable a lot of the time now. I have stretch marks, I can no longer bend over comfortably, I can't put on my own socks or shoes and my face is round. I haven't worn my wedding band in over a month and my feet and hands are swollen.

But I wouldn't trade it for ANYTHING....

I cannot wait to meet our little girl.